Tag Archives: higher ground

Channeling Hemingway

In The Moveable Feast Ernest Hemingway said, “All you have to do is write one true sentence.  Write the truest sentence you know.” Well, lately that has been easier said than done on this here blog o’ mine.  Higher Ground High School has been a daily source of entertainment and potential blog fodder, but some of the most bizarre things that have been uttered in my office need individual posts and explanations of their own.  With that said, I cannot resist but list some of them here for you in complete random and out of context order just the way you (and by you, I mean I) like them.

  • His street name is Burnt Toast … because he’s really dark-skinned.
  • I didn’t beat his ass for realz; it was a friendly fade.
  • He hit his head on the big dude’s fist.
  • No, the floor was wet, and I slipped and hit my head on the labatory.   (Me:  The lavatory?)  Yeah, the zink.
  • All white people are not Mormons; some of them are devil worshipers.
  • You got some ashy ass lips … Where yo chapstick?
  • All I said to the teacher was “Damn.  We got another 20 minutes of this shit.”
  • (On a discipline referral which I later had to read aloud and explain to a parent) H****** referred to the other student as “Douche Bo Baggins.”
  • (singing) I like to move it, move it.
  • I can’t describe what she is wearing today because it is definitely something you have to see for yourself.
  • Gurl, you need to take yo bebe to the doctor; something is wrong with her eyes.
  • I  drank a forty for breakfast.
  • You ain’t no gangsta; I’ll show you gangsta just as soon as yo ass is in my car.

When I look back at these one true sentences, I recall another great Hemingway sentence:  “The good parts of a book may be only something a writer is lucky enough to overhear.” Won’t I be a lucky girl someday if this much is true? 

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Prejudice is the Child of Ignorance

Screaming, insolent, belligerent female student whose cell phone was confiscated for parent pick-up only: Shit! I hate you fucking white bitches!

What I wanted to say: We prefer to be called cracker ass crackers, but only we can call each other cracker.

What I said: I hear you, but for the record I don’t see color.  Don’t you listen to MJ?  It don’t matter if you’re black or white.  Woo-hoo.

What I should have said: Freedom comes with an educated mind.

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Yes, You Heard It Here First

Higher Ground HS is definitely what Willis was talkin' about.

Now, the world don’t move to the beat of just one drum,

What might be right for you, may not be right for some.

A man is born, he’s a man of means.

Then along come two, they got nothing but their jeans.

But they got, Different Strokes.

It takes, Different Strokes.

It takes, Different Strokes to move the world.

Everybody’s got a special kind of story

Everybody finds a way to shine,

It don’t matter that you got not alot

So what,

They’ll have theirs, and you’ll have yours, and I’ll have mine.

And together we’ll be fine….

Because it takes, Different Strokes to move the world.

Yes it does.

It takes, Different Strokes to move the world.

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Take Your Passion And Make It Happen!

“Alex” is a high school student by day and a fashionista by night.  He sits in the very front row of the fourth period fashion design class and models his own creations every Monday through Friday.  Today he was channeling 1983 and Jennifer Beals in only the way your token gay male can do.  One of the male assistant principals referred him to me to address his low-cut, navel-revealing, off-the-shoulder, sleeveless and cropped hot pink sweatshirt.   I would like to add that he was wearing a cropped white wife-beater underneath and perfectly bedazzled skinny jeans with black ballet flats.  Now that you have a visual … on to the priceless exchange which transpired when I pulled him aside to address his multiple dress code violations.

Psycho Hose Beast:  Nobody’s denying you have fashion sense, but we don’t show our pit hair or navels at school.

Higher Ground High’s Token Gay Male:  Once again, discriminated against because of my fierce-itude.  You’ll be sorry when you see me on Project Runway.

PHB:  I would be sorrier if I saw you in the remake of Flashdance.

HGHTGM:  Oh no, you didn’t!

Sweet Heyzeus, I hope he wears leg warmers tomorrow.

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Born to Hunt Forced to Work

Are you new here?  This one isn’t about you.  The best posts on this blog are always about me.

Today was one of the most positive first days of work I have ever had as a school administrator.   Yeah, I know.  I’m shocked too.  Personally, I think I deserve it after the toxicity from which I just rid myself.

Being new to an existing building has its advantages and disadvantages.   While I am basking in the glow of all the positivity around me, I do not know the building very well which can be a huge disadvantage (even though I have a school map and an app for that).   This is where you, I Read Banned Books visitors, come in.  I want you to send me on a scavenger hunt.

Who: My lovers, lurkers, twisties, and stalkers

What:  The Psycho Hose Beast Goes on a Scavenger Hunt

When: 8/17/10 – 8/22/10

Where: Higher Ground School (Yes, this is what I’m calling the new work location.)

Why: Because y’all worship me and know that I will go voodoo on all y’all’s asses!

How: Leave a comment here naming the item you would like me to find.  I will post pictures of the found items in a follow-up post on Monday, August 23, 2010.

Disclaimer:  I reserve the right to edit requests and/or photos and be a creative bitch in order to keep both my own and also my employer’s identities private.  In other words, think before you order me to … I don’t know … just challenge me.

With that said, you are now cordially invited to challenge my superior intellect and sarcastic attitude. 

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Till I Reach My Highest Ground

My summer break is essentially OVER.  Tomorrow is the first contracted day for ten-month administrators.  I will spend at least half of the day at the annual administrative kick-off Fashion Show.  I went shopping in my own closet for something new to wear.  Yes, I have power suits from last year that were never worn because they did not fit.  Yes, that means what you think it means.  I lost weight this summer … over 20 pounds as of today.  It’s amazing what being away from a toxic environment can do to your physical and mental health.

I have spent the last 67 days in what I refer to as D & R (detox and recovery).  While I have not been around I Read Banned Books much, I have been planning for the upcoming school year and moving on from the House of Horrors.  I mentioned a little while back that I movin’ on up to the East side.  There was a slight change of plans and location due to the budget crisis in our state and school district.  I am still migrating to a high school, but this one is extremely close to home.  I will be working with a fantastic team, and I am optimistic about my future as a school administrator for the first time in a very long time.  The last two years have been a long and winding road, but I finally feel like I have made it to higher ground.

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